Thursday, June 9, 2011

Learning to be sassy

I don't know how to wink.

Okay, so that's not entirely true. I understand the concept and my muscles respond appropriately when I concentrate on the task. I guess my issue isn't with the act of winking as much as it is that I don't have any idea what to do with my face while I'm winking. I don't know to what extent I should wink.

When I try to wink, one of two things happens. I either wink too much:

or not enough:

Maybe I should have titled this post "Reason 742 Why I'm Single."

Anyway, so this week, our letter was W. Naturally, I decided it would be a great idea to teach my kids how to wink in honor of our letter. I'm the last person in the world you want teaching someone how to wink (see above pictures), but I'd say it went over pretty well. Better than the time I thought I would teach them how to read, at least.

Not all of the kids were confident enough in their abilities to pose for a picture, but here are a few of the really good ones. And by really good, obviously I mean hilarious.

Lest you think I like any of these kids more than Brian, I asked him to join in the fun too.

I may not be the best at teaching trivial things like spelling and math, but I'm teaching them how to flirt really, really badly, and that's all that matters in the end.

*Note: The first picture I post always ends up as the thumbnail on facebook's newsfeed. I've been debating this whole time whether I should add an irrelevant unicorn or something at the beginning so people don't see those terrible pictures unless they click the link. Screw it. Let's call it a lesson in humility. Or humiliation. Either way, a lesson.


  1. This made my day better, thanks :) And winking not enough looks rather creepy so I'd recommend over-winking if you're unable to wink the correct amount. Oh, and that poor girl doesn't understand the concept of the wink like the boys do in the pics.

  2. Oh my gosh. Too freaking cute! What an adorable group of kids!

  3. The kids are so cute. For fun, let me see if I can guess their personalities from the pictures. Tell me if I'm close or way off.

    "Red Tie"
    The Success-Oriented, Pragmatic Type: Adaptive, Excelling, Driven, and Image-Conscious

    The Sensitive, Withdrawn Type: Expressive, Dramatic, Self-Absorbed, and Temperamental

    "Black Polo"
    The Rational, Idealistic Type: Principled, Purposeful, Self-Controlled, and Perfectionistic

    "Last One"
    The Caring, Interpersonal Type: Demonstrative, Generous, People-Pleasing, and Possessive

    Practically perfect in every way

  4. I feel so sad for the kid who had to hold his eye down...only cause look how sad he is that he had to do it that way!